10. Javier Vazquez sucked, and the Yanks saved the Sox from getting him.
9. Like the ugly rock singer or awkward nerd who gets the girl, the 2004 season undid a lot of self-doubt. Without coming back from 0-3 against the prom king in the ALCS (let's call him Biff, in a tip to Back To The Future), it would not have been nearly as sweet.
8. El Duque sucked, and the Yanks saved the Sox from getting him.
7. George Steinbrenner's sunglasses remind me of Elton John's flaming accessories (based on an idea from my good friend Todd).
6. ARod, Jeter and Bucky Dent are as pretty as Gisele, Brady, and Bridget. DISCLAIMER: I'm getting old, so my standards are slipping.
5. Chen Ming Wang's pitching is scrubbing William Hung's singing off the D-List. Too bad my good friend Fazz throws all these chinese surnames around as if they were euphemisms for private parts. He and FDR would have gotten along great.
4. ARod doesn't suck, but he's overpaid, and the Yanks saved the Sox from getting him.
3. Because of the ARod signing, the Yanks missed out on Schilling. Swap those two, and 2004 ends differently.
2. Roger Clemens totally sucks, and the Yanks saved the Sox from getting him in his geriatric phase. (OK, he was one of the best ever to play the sport, like ...)
1. Mariano Rivera is one of the best ever to play the sport. To play any sport. Any Sox fan who wouldn't have wanted him in a Boston uniform doesn't know the game or a good man.
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